What is Emo?

What Can We Do?

As we have seen, the emo subculture seems to promote self-injury and suicide.  The vast increases in self-injury and suicide since the emo fad has come to prominence are apparently linked.  There are no other explanations that can account for all of the adverse changes hat we have seen in youth culture.  The real question then is what to do with this information.   My answer is to start this website, knowing that it would upset quite a few people.  There is more however, that we all can do.  Before we start, let's look at some concepts.

Essentially, a subculture is a variation on the dominant culture.  Subcultures usually have some sort of difference or disagreement with dominant culture that causes conflict.  This actually makes subcultures attractive to many adolescents, as they are attracted to rebellion.  The "hippie" movement of the 60's is the most obvious example of this.  They had clothes, musical forms, and politics that challenged the "establishment".  This made it attractive to millions of adolescents and young adults.  Emo is no different in that regard.  

A subculture identifies itself by the clothes, music, behaviors, and art that it produces.  These tangible things, or "products" are the "identification card" and the mode of transmission for the messages of the subculture.  A kid with jet-black hair over one of his eyes, listening to My Chemical Romance, wearing his sister's pants and makeup is advertising to the world, "Look at me, I'm emo!"  It also acts as an advertisement for others to join the subculture.  When you consider that teens are trying to find out "who they are", prone to rebellion, and are overly concerned with "fitting in", it's easy to see how emo has gone from an obscure sub genre of punk to a growing dominant fad of the early 21st century.  Subcultures end up creating their own level of conformity in their compliance with their own fashions and art forms.  Deviations of this will lead to accusations of being a "poser", which is apparently the worst thing that one emo can call another.  Ironically, the subculture based on "nonconformity" is rather cruel to members who do not conform.  

Ok, enough of the sociology class.  Since the "products" of the subculture helps it spread, we need to find ways to "disconnect" them, or reduce their reach.  Here are some ways to do this.

1. Spend time with your kids!  There is no substitute for good communication with your children.  This does not mean be more of a friend than a parent, but it does mean to keep good lines of communication open.  Take you kid to lunch, go to a movie, talk, and show them that you care with your actions.  Keeping lines of communication open will prevent many adolescent problems.  If your kid trusts you, and your expectations are clear, they'll come to you with their questions and problems, and will be less likely to seek out a destructive subculture or fad, like emo, to identify with.
2. Listen to the kid's music.  See what messages may be in the lyrics.  If you cannot understand them, go to Google and type "band name" lyrics.  You will get many responses.  Pick a site and find the band and song.  It takes about five minutes.  This is how I found the lyrics posted on this site. Remember that listening to "sad songs" does not put anyone at risk for negative behavior.  Just talk to your kids about what the music means to them! 
3. Pay attention to warning signs.  If your kid is suddenly withdrawn, stays in their room much of the time, has a sudden change in friends and activities, has a change in clothes and music choices, take extra time with them and find out what is going on.  Don't come off like an interrogator!  Refer to #1.
4. If your child is engaging in self-injury, please seek professional help immediately.  While they may not be suicidal, they are clearly having significant difficulties.  Ask other parents or local support groups for help in finding a qualified therapist/clinic.
5. Network with other parents.  Get together with the parents of your kid's friends. Compare "notes".  Get a sense of what the kids are doing and with whom.  If the kids are staying with a friend, call the parents and make sure that they activity is monitored.  
6. BEWARE OF MYSPACE and BEBO!  As mentioned in some of the articles on this site, Myspace.com has literally thousands of profiles and groups devoted to emo and self-injury.  One of the reasons that the emo fad can spread so well is that they can communicate and "advertise" via myspace.  The more people that are exposed to emo, the greater the chance that some of them will enter that lifestyle and engage in the destructive behaviors that we've discussed here.  Limiting that influence will cut down on their ability to affect others.  Another concern regarding myspace is that any profile of a child is automatically set to "private".  This means that the only people that can see the profile are the online "friends" of the profile owner.  Myspace "friends" are other member of myspace that your child can select to see their profile, exchange messages, files, and so on.  In other words, if your child doesn't let you see their profile, there is no way for you to see what they're doing there!!  You may have no idea who your child is talking to, nor what they are talking about!  We have discovered that some kids under our care were planning drug parties and other illegal activities on Myspace.  This just isn't a "emo" thing, it's a parenting issue.  If you have children and teens in your home, either monitor their computer use, or ban them from myspace entirely.  You can use you browser to block myspace.  Look at the help section in your browser to see how.   Bebo is a newer social networking site, and our staff have noticed that there seem to be more emo related sites there than on Myspace.  
7.  Inform school personnel.  More than likely, the staff at your local school, either public or private, will have heard of emo.  They will have also probably seen the increases in self-injury and suicide attempts.  Discuss the information with them; feel free to give them the address for this site.
8. Encourage school dress codes.  While this is sometimes controversial, dress codes can reduce the viability of emo's; reducing their ability to "advertise" their ideas.  Remember that a subculture is able to spread and grow by recruiting other members.  Reducing their visibility will hamper their "advertising."  The dress codes do no even have to mean uniforms, just banning piercings, all black clothing, emo hairstyles, and so forth; will reduce their visibility and ability to spread their messages. Pay special attention to wristbands and bracelets, as emo kids use these to hide cuts and scars (see picture below).    If you want to propose a dress code at your school, please follow procedures to be put on the agenda at your local school board meeting.  Present facts, and try not to be too emotional!